Mind Blowing

Thoughts and other crap on people, life and maybe footie...
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I wrote this haiku
with the hope that just maybe.
It blows you away.

The name is irrelevant.
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The age is older.
The stories are true.
This blog is mine.

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Monday, October 31, 2005

Little Shop of Horrors

It's raining heavily outside here on a Monday afternoon three days from Hari Raya. From this kinda situation, it really takes a super-human effort by anyone to keep focus on the job at hand. So here I am unfocused.
Anyways, I've noticed that most local bloggers are in the holiday spirit. Hari Raya seems to be flavor of the week. So as not to be left behind, my postings for this week will probably be Hari Raya related (you've been warned).
I did my Raya shopping yesterday. I rarely go shopping, as in going to mall to buy lotsa junk stuff. But on the occasional times that I do, I prefer to do it alone. The burden of having someone tagging along on my little escapade just bugs me. Anti-social? No lah. Anti 'orang komen barang yang aku beli' is more like it. I don't like second opinions because everyone lies. Even I do too when accompanying someone on a shopping trip:
Cantik tak? Cantikkk...
OK tak? Okayyyyy...
You big liar you.

But I have this little shopping habit that I so adore (I'm so in love with myself). When I go to the mall, I like to go early in the morning. The crowd is less, the shops just opened, and the cashier guy doesn't smell of ketiak.
So off I went yesterday early in the morning. Only to find that even at 10 am, parking space at MidValley was hard to find. WTF?? What time did these people arrive? After sahur??
But eventually I found a nice spot and did what had to be done. Actually in all honesty, the pure joy of going to the mall early in the morning can only be felt when you finish up and leave around noon. Because that's when as you leave, you glance and look at the looooonnngggg queue of cars that has already piled up to enter. At that particular moment, it feels like a Mastercard ad:

Football jersey: RM 199.00
Leather shoes: RM 299.00
The look of the people in cars with their pissed off 'what-the-hell-am-I-doing-here' face: Priceless.

I just smiled at them when I really wanted to do was laugh out loud screaming, "So long, suckers!!"

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

Sunday, October 30, 2005

Live from Seremban, it's Saturday night!!

Ho-hum, the weekend's halfway over already.
Just finished attending another majlis berbuka today at the MB's place. This should be the last for this year (I hope). Social gatherings can be quite tiresome. It sounds fun at first, but then you find yourself coming back late at night looking forward to see your pillow. Though I know this might be something I have to grow accustomed to, I still wonder how politicians do it. Tak penat ke sucking-up and all that?
But good thing it's Saturday night. And Saturday nights at home usually mean footy and CNBC. CNBC?? You read that right. You're missing a lot if CNBC isn't part of your weekend. Back-to-back Leno and the crazy people at SNL are not to be missed. Add to that Jon Stewart at CNN (yes, CNN) and you've got a great reason to subscribe to the News package. Hey, the news channels are not just about Bush and Co. okay, even though on a humour level they're about the same.
They used to have Conan right after Jay Leno, who I thought was even crazier than Jay himself even though his guestlists were mostly 'whoisdat?'. Who cares? Just change channels after the monologue lah.
But did you catch Leno tonight? He had Dakota Fanning as a guest, who I thought was sooooo adorable and cute. Really cute, as in 'I'd-like-to-pinch-her-cheeks-till-it-bleeds' cute. And she had braces on. And she was so bubbly and all that. And I mean that in the most non-paedophilitic (?) way possible. You people believe me, right? Right??
And oh...before I forget. I know this might be a bit late, but Chelsea are OUT of the League Cup. Nenenenene!!

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

Friday, October 28, 2005

The Petronas Ad Moment


Ramadhan is drawing to a close. Wasn't it just yesterday I was asking if it was too early to start playing lagu Raya? How time flies. Oh that's so cliche' huh?
With less than a week from Hari Raya, you must be in another country if you didn't notice the hype. Today might be the last day of work before the long holidays for most of you. I wasn't allowed to take any leave this Raya season, which means I'm stuck here in this old building on the eve of Hari Raya. Now that's a first.
The boss wanted people to be in the office. I could understand that. You never know when someone will do a Karam Singh Walia and make a surprise visit, provoking the millions at home with, "Di manakah semua orang di pejabat ini??!" and wrapping it up with a kick-ass pantun or two.
No biggie. I'm here in my hometown. My balik kampung would technically mean the journey from the pejabat to my house. Thrilling stuff, huh?
I've never really felt the true joy of balik kampung. The farthest that I travelled to come home was when I was in school. You see, both of my parents are from the Seremban area. It has its pros and cons, but you feel kinda left out by the whole balik kampung experience. Both of my grandparents have passed away so there isn't exactly a kampung to look forward to anyway. My balik kampung for the last 6 years has been the trip on the KL - Seremban highway. Nothing much to shout about, I know. But it feels kinda nice to get those crappy freebies and fake smiles from the PLUS operators. And the free Nescafe' at the Petronas stations are okay too. It's not exactly gourmet, but heck it's free so just teguk je la.
Which leads me to the point of this entry, which seems pointless up till here. I just wanna wish everyone a safe journey home this holiday season. I know some of you will travel less than the journey I take, but some of you might be going on a cross-country trip too. Wherever your destination is, near or far, just be careful okay. I don't have that many blog readers, so I wouldn't wanna lose the precious few :P
And of course, Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri to everyone. Maaf zahir batin for any of my wrongdoings, intentionally or unintentionally. Take care and God bless.

P/s: Who's working on Wednesday next week? Contact me and we can sing 'Dendang Perantau' together while listening to the countless Raya dedications on Era. Are you up for it?

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Talkin' Bout A Revolution

Rosa Parks died yesterday. And with that, one of the most recognized icons of the modern-day struggle for equality passes away.
She is truly an inspiration, not only for Afro-Americans, but for the whole world. Her decision on that fateful afternoon in 1955 to not give up her seat to a white man (which was required by law at the time) is the modern-day legend of an everyman hero. It couldn't be any simpler. She just refused to give up her seat on the bus.
She wasn't the first to do such a thing, but she was the spark that ignited the whole civil rights movement in America. She was living proof that anyone can stand up (in her case, sitting down) and make a difference.
I've always thought that everyone in this world had a reason to be here. We're all bound for some sort of destiny, which can be anything big or small. Rosa Parks is lucky. She found her destiny in 1955, at the age of 42. It's always interesting to think, what if she had missed the bus? What if she just gave in and let the man have his seat? What if she wasn't tired that day? It could have been a different story altogether.
If Rosa Parks felt like standing that day, would we have Denzel kissing his Oscar? Would we be wearing Air Jordans? Would Condoleezza Rice be the most powerful woman in America? We'll never know. But I think the whole world was glad she sat down. I'm glad so, too.

"She sat down in order that we all might stand up - and the walls of segregation came down,"
Jesse Jackson, civil rights leader

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Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Can you tap-dance?

Andrew Largeman: Let's just talk about good stuff.
Sam: Good stuff?
Andrew Largeman: Yeah. Glass half full shit. What do you got?
Sam: I got a little buzz. I got that.
Sam: What you got?
Andrew Largeman: I got a little buzz going
Andrew Largeman: and I like you.
[Sam, embarassed, giggles]
Andrew Largeman: So there's that. I guess I have that.
Sam: I can tap-dance. You wanna see me tap-dance?
Andrew Largeman: I would love to see you tap-dance.

Garden State, 2004

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Friday, October 21, 2005

Rumours 'R Us

Syed Nadzri and I shared the same sentiments (A case of brilliant minds think alike or unknown blogger trying to have a posting on a loooongg Friday lunch hour?) And thus I echoed his piece on the pathetic attitude of some people in this country who would go about aimlessly spreading ugly lies. On a very somber day yesterday, at a time we were still in shock over Datin Seri Endon's passing, we heard news of Tun Ghafar Baba's death.
I, on a personal level felt cheated and disgusted because I was relayed the news straight from the mouth of a senior official here. Being the (not-so) innocent young protege' that I was, I accepted the news without doubt because hey, this is the Gomen here we're talking about. Surely, the officials KNOWS what's going on, especially on all things Malaysiana. And so I thought.
And how stupid I felt after learning that it wasn't true. How could someone in the right frame of mind come up with such absurdity? What kind of sick joy do you get from spreading rumours about someone's death? I blame the attitude of people who get this sorta feeling of higher power when they know something others don't. Akulah paling uptodate sekali. Akulah yang paling terer. Terer my ass.
There's a lesson to be learnt here from me.:
1. Never believe everything I read or hear.
2. Never pass any rumours that I'm not sure about.
2. Never trust that idiot.

And oh, there will be no public holiday on Monday.
So get back to work!

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

Thursday, October 20, 2005


As we all might be aware by now, Datin Seri Endon Mahmood passed away this morning. My deepest condolences goes out to Pak Lah and everyone in the family.
The passing away of a dearly beloved can never be easy, even for the most powerful man in the country. The nation prays and mourns with you, Datuk Seri.


o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

(Un)Official Theme Song Ver. 1.0

Things have not been smooth the past few days. Oh, it's nothing really. Standard Drama Queen King material. But that doesn't stop me from fulfilling Miss Chi's request. At least it keeps my mind of other ermm...pointless things.
So here's my version of the theme song for Bloggers United(?)...hehe. Well takpelah, janji bukan THAT other United. And besides, how could I say no to a lady's request? (see? I told ya I'd make a good hubby :P)
Hope you like it, to be sung to the tune of 'YMCA' performed by the orang kampung from New York, the Village People. So get your police uniform and biker gear ready and sing along with me...

Young man, do you need a new friend?
I said, young man, stop playing with your hand.
I said, young man, this is the latest trend
There's no need to be unhappy.

Young girl, there's a site you can go.
I said, young girl, you don't need a dildo.
You can go there, and I'm sure you will find
Many ways to have a good time.

It's fun to have your own B-L-O-G.
It's fun to have your own B-L-O-G.

You can say anything for people to enjoy,
You can hang out with all the boys...

It's fun to have your own B-L-O-G.
It's fun to have your own B-L-O-G.

You can be a Datin, you can be even a hunk,
You can do whatever you want...

Young man, do you need therapy?
I said, young man, what do you want to be?
I said, young man, you can make real your dreams.
But you've got to know this one thing!

Young man, this is the internet
I said, young man, what you see is not what you get,
But just go there, to the B.L.O.G.
Just type and let yourself free.

Just go and get your own B-L-O-G
Just go and get your own B-L-O-G

You can be anyone, whoever you want to be
You can even write like Chi...

Just go and get your own B-L-O-G
Just go and get your own B-L-O-G

You can be a star, though you're not kelakar
Everybody knows who you are

Young girl, I was once in your shoes.
I said, I was down and out with the blues.
I felt no man cared if I were alive.
I felt the whole world was so jive...

That's when someone YM'ed to me,
And said, young man, please click on this link
It's a group there called Bloggers United
They're fun so don't be frightened

That's why we have our own B-L-O-G
That's why we have our own B-L-O-G

You can leave a comment, whatever you want to tell
Even tell them to go to hell...

That's why we have our own B-L-O-G
That's why we have our own B-L-O-G
Young man, young man, just type what you want to say
Young man, young man, they won't charge you with ISA

That's why we have our own B-L-O-G
That's why we have our own B-L-O-G
Young man, young man, are you listening to me?
Young man, young man, blogging is for free..

Must get me one of those Red Indian costumes someday

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

How's it going to be?

I'm only pretty sure that I can't take anymore
Before you take a swing, I wonder what are we fighting for
When I say out loud, I want to get out of this
I wonder, is there anything I'm going to miss?
I wonder how's it gonna be, When you don't know me?
How's it gonna be, When you're sure I'm not there?
How's it gonna be, When there's no one there to talk to?
Between you and me
'Cause I don't care, how's it gonna be

How's it gonna be?

Where we used to laugh, There's a shouting match
Sharp as a thumbnail scratch
A silence I can't ignore
Like the hammock by the doorway we spent time in, Swings empty
I don't see lightning like last fall when it was always about to hit me
I wonder how's it gonna be, when it goes down?
How's it gonna be, when you're not around?
How's it gonna be, when you found out there was nothin' between you and me?
'Cause I don't care, how's it gonna be.

-Third Eye Blind circa 1997-

Escapism? Frustration? Or disillusion?

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

Monday, October 17, 2005

Tell me a secret

I think the only reason they put up new secrets on Sunday is so that we'll have a fresh bunch to kick-start our Monday.
And nothing gets your week going like PostSecret.

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

Saturday, October 15, 2005

Bye Bye Miss American Pie

I feel pretty damn smart today (excuse me for I have very low self-esteem). Finished up tidying and cleaning up my commenting tools. Installed a new one by getting myself on the Haloscan bandwagon. I've been a loyal user of BlogBack for almost 2 years now. It's a pity they had to close down. Ah well, it was fun while it lasted. So here's a big Thank You to BlogBack and its boss Marcus Campbell for coming up with such a useful tool and assisting me with the export and management of my BlogBack account.
So it'll be Haloscan from now on. I wanted to look for an alternative commenting system, but time has not been on my side. Like they say, if you can't beat 'em join 'em.
Let's see how it goes.

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

Thursday, October 13, 2005

Put your own title here

Sigh. Poor Mahdzir Khalid. He might be jobless just because some people don't know when to quit. I have nothing against Syed Razak and I hope he gets well soon, but if we feel we can't deliver 100% mentally and physically to a certain responsibility, maybe it's time we step aside, eh? The problem with Malays Malaysians is that we sometimes hang on to something wayyyy past overdue.

On another note, professional golf has a newcomer this week. And with that, the shape of golf's future looks pretty fine good. Literally.
Who gives a damn about putts and bogeys anyway?

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Don't tell me Raya is near

I'm no eager-beaver. But is it too early for me to start playing lagu Raya?

'Mintak mak kuih sepotong
Saya mahu makan kerna perut kosong'

Forgive me for the holiday mood. I can't help it coz some of the makciks are starting to sell kuih semperit.

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

Sunday, October 09, 2005

Talk of the town

Seremban is buzzing with delight lately. I've never seen this town so excited since errrrr....mmmm...ahhhh...I can't remember when.
The reason for all this euphoria is the opening of the eagerly-anticipated Jaya Jusco in Seremban 2. So as a good citizen of Serembanville, I had to get my ass down there to see what the hype was all about. And with that, I spent the weekend checking out Seremban's latest fad.
Friday night was spent watching 'The Longest Yard' at TGV. TGV in Seremban? Whoa. I never thought I would type that out just a few months ago. The place was still brand new. Construction was still taking place. It's a good thing I didn't get any cement in my hot dog. And even the cineplex smelled of fresh paint. No wonder there weren't many people watching. I could easily blame Adam Sandler for that, but my hunch tells me maybe it's the place. It's a good thing they had the staff working too, else there might have been just the 3 of us plus the couple making out at the back. Whew.
And the crowd today was just ramai gile. I hardly had any breathing space. And speaking about space, parking was non-existent. I parked a good half a kilometer away. It was crazy I tell ya. Jakun betul la orang Somban ni. Myself included :P
But I'm really glad they opened up the place in the first place. It's a good boost for Seremban's ailing township. It's like a small answer to our prayers. And I bet there are tons of that alright. Best thing is, it's hardly 10 minutes from home. Double whammy. And so, globalisation finally reaches Seremban's shores. Yes, planet Starbucks has landed.
Midvalley? OU?? Apa tu?

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

Ego & Me

Sometimes my ego grows so big it finally bursts, leaving me with nothing but hot air.
I'm sorry.

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

Thursday, October 06, 2005

Poron for morons

I received this e-mail from a friend recently. This message came out while he was trying to access this blog from within the compounds of the great Putrajaya:

Web Page Blocked

You have tried to access a web page which is in
violation of Go****ment (I had to censor this for reasons known to me alone)
of Malaysia's internet usage policy.

URL: matasepet.blogspot.com
Category: Pornography

This software comes with monitoring and statistics
tools. Please do not abuse Office Facilities.


What?? I don't mind them blocking access to this site, but look at the Category given. Helllloooooo?? Do you see any bare-chested woman here? Do you see any teenagers here? Do you see Paris Hilton here? Do you...errr..I think that's enough. Right. Thank you. I forgive you.

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Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Seloka di bulan puasa: The Return

Tiba sudah bulan Ramadhan,
Bulan jaga minum dan makan,
Bukan takat tu je yang tahan,
Nafsu kita yang mengalahkan setan.

Bangun bersahur di awal pagi,
Ketika lena dibuai mimpi,
Kena pulak tengah terbayangkan Siti,
Bila terjaga, rasa nak maki.

Nak tak nak, terpaksa la pergi,
Bersahur bersama dengan family,
Muka dan mulut tak payah cuci,
Rupa macam terlepas serenti.
Lauk semalam di celah gigi,
Tambah pulak dengan air liur basi,
Permulaan yang baik di pagi hari.

Suasana di ofis sangatlah muram,
Muka masing-masing, gile masam.
Tetapi juga, ada yang happy,
Aktif berjalan ke sana sini.
Kita juga naik pelik,
"Apsal bawak bungkus dalam beg plastik?"

Pasar Ramadhan wajib ada,
Boleh dijumpai di mana-mana,
At every street and every corner,
Confirm jual juadah berbuka.

Kuih-muih bermacam kaler,
Bermacam jenis beraneka rupa,
Masakan Minang sampai ke Jawa,
Cakap je apa, mesti ada.

Bila pergi, rasa nak beli semua,
Macam dirasuk hantu puaka,
Kita kekadang bole naik gila,
Tak cukup satu, beli je lima.

Tiba berbuka, kita balun semua,
Tak payah pandang kiri dan kanan,
Selesai sudah, mulut ternganga,
Sambil bergegas nak pergi jamban.

Sunat Tarawikh kita laksanakan,
Awal bulan, semangat berapi,
Bila sampai penghujung bulan,
Liat la pulak, asyik tengok Mawi.

Saya ni bukanlah macam bagus sangat,
Perangai teruk, bercakap je hangat,
Sama-samalah kita semua mengingat,
Takut nanti puasa tak berkat,
Pahala takde, puasa je penat.

The month of Ramadhan is sacred and holy,
Always brings a touch of melancholy,
In all of my life's short history,
It never fails to make me happy.
And to end this failed piece of poetry,
Have a happy and blessed Ramadhan, to everyone and everybody.

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Bumiputera Rockers

Di suatu petang yang hening,

*Telefon berdering*

"Hello. Boleh saya bercakap dengan Encik Stone? (bukan nama sebenar)"
"Ya, saya bercakap. Siapa di sana?"
"Nama saya Mat Pot (juga bukan nama sebenar). Saya ni pegawai dari BPR. Boleh saya berjumpa dengan Encik dalam 15 minit?"
Alamak!! BPR? Aku tak (sempat) amik rasuah pun!
"Berkenaan apa itu, ya?" Jantungku berdegup dengan kencang.
"Saya nak berjumpa dengan Encik Stone untuk membincangkan..."

Honestly, my blood just froze upon hearing the 3-letter acronym. But no worries (I hope), guys and gals. Standard operating procedure rupanya. I even thought it was a prank at first. Silly 'ol Stone.
And all of a sudden, my brain remarked, "How do they make sure the BPR people don't take bribes?"
Thought for today was brought to you by Stone, the leading expert in all things mengarut.

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Monday, October 03, 2005

Six Degrees of Separation

I will not try to be some cool-looking, fancy, British-accented critic with a penchant for the arts. I will not try to show I am part of the crowd by having small talk and tapping shoulders every time someone passes by. I will not comment on how I think the wardrobe symbolizes freedom from the use of polyester cloth, or that the bamboo used on the set shows a sign of unity and strength. I will not try to interpret why they used Bahasa in one of the scenes and how I love the part where they showed two guys from different racial backgrounds reminiscing their childhood and innocence. I will not comment on how I think all the actors were superb, especially Alin Mosbit who really impressed me. I will also try not to look smart commenting on all these 'artsy-fartsy' (quoting Mooke) things.
Never mind the water issue we have between us.
Never mind that Mahathir and Lee Kuan Yew have more in common than they would like to admit.
Never mind that Singaporeans are so kiasu.
Never mind that we try so hard to be better, stronger and taller than them.
Fact is, Separation 40 is sarcastic, funny and damn smart. And depsite the times we hated each other's guts, we can certainly laugh and joke about it.
Maybe we never really separated after all.

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o