Che' Tam taught me a valuable lesson on writing.
that i wasn't good in fictional work. i just suck.
Che' Tam is the name of a character for a story i once wrote for the school magazine. if u were lucky enough (or unlucky depending on which way you look at it) to obtain a 1996 edition of Perintis, my failed piece of work was there for all to see. i wasn't really proud of the story, but i lost my 1996 Perintis so anyone who has a copy, i would actually pay to have it. for sentimental reasons i suppose.
in any case, the story was about this boy and his relationship with Che' Tam, which in the end of the story was revealed to be actually a smelly, 1000-pound kerbau
. i wrote it like a someone in love but since i had zero experience then, i transferred that love to that of an animal. and i love surprise endings, so that would explain the revelation of Che' Tam as the kerbau
in the end. it wasn't much of a surprise anyway, but heck it delighted me back then.
reading back the story a few years later made me realise it wasn't that good for me to be proud of it. i lack creativity. there was no ohhhs and ahhhs of reading a good story. that kick
was missing. and so, i realised i just fail at fiction writing. it's a good thing i realised it sooner than later.
but still i love writing.
honestly, i do. call it nerdy, geeky or whatsoever, writing is the best way i express myself. i may not be very good at it (or else Random House would have given me a call already), but still it's my way of escaping the coconut shell i am currently and always have been under. i realised that i love giving out my opinions. though i am a nobody to be given attention to, i thought that my opinions and comments on a certain issue are worth listening to.
i have reaped a few rewards on the things i write. (beware: berlagak section ahead. tread with caution) one of the proudest moment in my small, boring life was to have my letter appear in Time magazine back in 2001. though i didn't get any prizes for that, having the editors of Time deem my letter worth listening to and having it published was just over the moon. it was small, but very meaningful to me.
other than that, i have won small prizes, a book and some money from writing. i am a small-time writer. i like that term. makes me perasan
so thanks to Che' Tam, i know i don't belong in storytelling. the real world is just as exciting, so why make it up? but in saying that, i have this screenplay i wrote a while ago. it was for a contest that i didn't even enter in the end, but i finished it up anyway. maybe for some other time. but i'm not gonna let anyone read it. no way. tapi macam la korang berminat nak baca pun, so jangan nak berlakon la.
and besides, i wanna direct, produce and act in the movie. so i can go to the Academy Awards and have all the Oscars to myself. if you're lucky, i'll include you in my acceptance speech. heh.
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