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Monday, June 21, 2004

My father the hero

so yesterday the world celebrated Father's Day. and where was i? nowhere near my father, that's for sure. i didn't actually forget. i knew it was Father's Day this sunday, so that kinda added to my sense of guilt. oh well...just becoz of one day doesn't make my father less than the man he is, and it doesn't make my love for him lessen in any way. it's the thought that matters, right? (i've always thought of this as a lame excuse so u don't feel bad about something...hehe)
Papa..the man i've always looked up upon since i was a kid. when i was younger, i didn't really know what he did. all i know is that he works in an office at the Seremban Lake Gardens. i knew he was somebody allrite...by the way he dresses to work. but what he did i never really cared as long as GI Joe and the Transformers were on TV. huh..spoiled brat...
of course, as i got older i learned about what he did and knew more about him. from knowing him, i learned a lot about life and the man i knew as Papa. this strengthened my respect and love for him, even though sometimes i feel that he may be a bit irrational at times, or was it just my teenage angst lashing out? i dunno...hard to tell the difference...maybe a little bit of both..
my father wasn't the 'TV sitcom dad' kind. he was very strict and showed his love in ways only those who know him can tell. my mom used to tell me that he NEVER changed our diapers when we were pissing and shitting in our Pampers. even the way he handled babies looks a bit awkward....hehehhe..kelakar lak bila aku fikir. cayalah Pa...good example of the dominant male species.
so he wasn't the textbook daddy type, but that didn't make him a lesser parent to any one of us. like i've mentioned before...my mom and dad makes a good balance as parents. if mama provided the warmth and cosiness of a mother's love, then papa provided the strictness and discipline so we won't get carried away. his thundering voice aje dah cukup buat aku gerun dah. u do not want to make him angry....
i knew he loved us but sometimes i feel that he overprotects us too much. one event that stands out is his decision not to let me go on a hiking trip to Gunung Korbu. boy...i was pissed. maybe it was a blessing in disguise. who knows?? but what i do no is that i haven't climbed a mountain ever since. skang ni dah besar pun..my urge to go hiking is already gone. malas2 je....
but because of him...i've been lucky to experience places i've never knew, people i've never met and environments i've never felt before. he really gave me an eye-opener on the world and the people that live in it. his views on politics and current events really strike me, but now that i'm older...i've learned to disagree with a few of them. my arguments with him are somewhat funny and would drag on with me just listening to him talking. talk about democracy...hehehehehe...
i love to hear him give his views on current events. pernah sekali tu aku suruh dia apply masuk ISIS...at least whatever i hear over the dinner table can be put into good use, rather than 'masuk telinga kiri keluar telinga kanan'. he declined...saying his no-hold-barred attitude is gonna land him in hot soup. somehow..i felt that might be true.
if there's one thing that i inherited from my father, it would have to be that sense of rebellion and tendency to disagree with people. though he's an UMNO supporter, UMNO is never safe from his comments and critic. trust me on this. whatever he didn't like, he'd say it. i guess that's why most of his students are scared of him...hehehhehe...
i've always wanted to come to one of his lectures just to see how it is. somehow...this never materialised and something i think will never happen. it just feels awkward, that's all.
that's just a sprinkle from the bigger picture that is my father. he's always been my hero, not the Jedi knight with the light saber, just the one sitting on his favourite sofa reading today's newspaper. that's my father...happy Papa's day...


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